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A new couple moves in to the Mertzes' apartment building. The Johnsons are supposedly rich oil tycoons from Texas. The Ricardos and Mertzes buy stock from the Johnsons, but when a detective comes to ask where the Johnsons' apartment is, the foursome gets suspicious that the oil stocks aren't worth anything, and that the whole thing was just a scam. Lucy tape records a conversation with the Johnsons for evidence, and she eventually talks them into giving back their "nasty, little ol' money." Everyone praises Lucy for a job well done... until the detective asks to use the Ricardos' phone to call his wife about making a fortune off of the oil stocks Lucy returned to Mr. Johnson!


  • The Johnsons first names are Sam and Nancy.
  • A still from this episode of the Ricardos and the Mertzes reading a newspaper article in the Ricardos' kitchen was used on the cover of a VHS tape entitled "Lucy's Lost Episodes."
  • Ricky found out that making a periwinkle blue custom Cadillac whose horn would toot "Babalu" would cost $12,000.
  • When trying to record the Johnsons' conversations, Lucy runs the wire down her pants leg and hides the microphone behind her blouse's built-in handkerchief.
  • Fred bought 10 shares of stock from Mr. Johnson, and he eventually lets the Ricardos have half.


  • Fred: Ethel's the advance scout, and Lucy's covering the rear.

Ricky: Oh, those two characters.

Fred: Yeah, nothing gets by the Snoopers' Patrol!

  • Fred: Nosiness is just part of a woman's charm, like hangin' stockings in the bathroom and nagging.
  • Ricky: How do you feel?

Lucy: Fine.

Ricky: Are you alright, Ethel?

Ethel: Sure, why?

Ricky: Fred, I'd like to report to you that, contrary to what you've always been told, curiosity does not kill a cat.

  • Fred: What are you gonna do? Grill [Nancy Johnson]?

Lucy: Like a cheese sandwich!

  • Lucy: What does your husband do?

Nancy Johnson: Well, he's in oil.

Lucy: Hair, suntan, cod liver, or castor?

Nancy: Oh, heavens! We don't mess with any of THEM in Texas! He's got oil wells.

Lucy and Ethel: Oil wells?!

Nancy: Well, just a couple of those little, bitty ones.

Lucy: Well, those little, bitty ones- they DO pump oil?

Ricky: Well, not as much as you're pumping HER, dear.

  • Ricky: Look, if [Sam Johnson]'s a millionaire, what is he doing living in this dump?

Ethel and Fred: Dump?!

Ricky: Yeah! To a millionaire, this is a dump!

Fred: I accept that!

  • Ethel: Are you gonna be a dumb bunny, too?

Fred: (in Bugs voice) Eh, what's up, doc?

  • Ricky: Lucy, with the money you save out of your household account, we couldn't buy enough oil for a salad!
  • Ricky: We'll just have to face it, honey- the Mertzes will be rich, and we'll still be poor.

Ethel: Oh, now, don't go putting on a poor mouth!

  • Lucy: I was just thinking about poor Little Ricky. That money could have gone for his college education.

Ethel: Well, that's certainly hitting a rich godmother below my money belt!

  • Fred: We'll split [the oil stock] with you. THat's the least I can do, I guess. Now, we've got 10 shares and we'll give you one.

Lucy: That really IS the least you can do!

  • Ricky: Yeah, Fred, what's five shares to a bil oil typhoon like you?
  • Ethel: Good morning, Lucy-Lu.

Lucy: Hi, Ethel, honey. Are those new furs?

Ethel: No, they're yesterday's!

  • Lucy: Millionaire, millionaire- you know, I've said it so often that it doesn't mean much anymore.

Ethel: You know somethin'? We might even get to be billionaires.

Lucy: Yeah, or even trillionaires!

Ethel: Or even zillionaires!

Lucy: Or even... What comes after zillionaires?

Fred: The Income Tax Department!

  • Ricky: Don't count your chickens before your bridges is hatched!
  • Ricky: You said [Sam] had a kind face!

Lucy: Yeah, I didn't say WHAT kind!

  • Ethel: If you're the kind of people we would have had to associate with if we were millionaires, I'm glad we were wiped out!
  • Sam Johnson: Down Texas way, a deal is a deal!

Lucy: Our money, please.

Nancy: Sam, if that's the way she feels, give her back her nasty, little ol' money!